Graduation Term

Oh, nursing school. WHERE DO I EVEN BEGIN?

It’s a bittersweet feeling knowing I’m just weeks away from finishing this chapter of my life. This wasn’t just school. It was a test of patience, grit, and pure puyat-powered survival. I’ve always said I wanted to write about my journey, record videos, maybe take those “look at me, almost a nurse” photos, haha... but truth be told, I’m bad at that. I barely had time to breathe, let alone document it all. But here I am writing anyway. A little over a week ago, I finished my preceptorship in L&D, and honestly, it was beautiful. I got to learn in one of the nicest birth centers in town, surrounded by kind people and powerful moments. There were days I left inspired, days I left exhausted, and moments in between when I just sat in my car like, “Wow. I really did that.” So thankful to my preceptors, other nurses, and doctors who empowered me so much. Now that I am so close to the finish line, I have been anticipating going back to work full-time, and I mean full-time, where I do not have to study, without dragging my tired brain to wake up at 3 am for another exam, clinical, or preceptorship. To be able to live life again, to rest without guilt, to eat meals on time, to see my family often and laugh, and to know I have energy left for them.

I want that. I’ve earned that.

And yes, I’ll say it....nursing school was fun. BUT, I did not cry. I repeat: I. Did. Not. Cry. Cringe, right? 😂 I asked myself, why? And maybe it’s because I already cried my heart out during EMT school. That was my breaking point. By the time I got to nursing school, I already knew pain. I knew sacrifice. I came in knowing it would break me, but this time, I also knew I could rebuild. Still, there were moments when life felt like it was at a standstill. I’d be staring at my notes, exhausted, watching time pass me by while everything else in my life had to be on pause. There were days when self-doubt crept in so loud I couldn’t hear anything else. I’d sit there and ask myself, do I even deserve this? Do I deserve to be here? To be a nurse? Impostor syndrome doesn’t care how hard you’ve worked. It doesn’t care how many tests you’ve passed or how many patients you’ve helped. It finds you in your quiet moments. The ones you don’t post about and make you question everything. But what I’ve learned is that the very fact that I asked those questions means I care deeply about this profession. It means I should be here. And just last week, I took a proctored exam in MedSurg, and to my shock, I scored in the 97th percentile nationally, with the national average sitting at 63.3%. I don’t share this to brag but to remind anyone reading this that your hard work does add up, even if it doesn’t always show up right away. There were so many times I felt like I was barely making it, questioning if I belonged in this program at all. So when I saw that score, I felt a wave of relief and deep, quiet gratitude.

What a powerful God we have and we serve. I couldn’t have done it without Him.

And no. I still didn’t cry. 😂 No crying for this Sarah girl.

And something I wanted to share is that out of all the students in my cohort, I was one of only two who never got an academic probation. And listen, I take so much pride in that. Because if you know, you know. Nursing school is not a walk in the park. It’s more like a hike with no map, in the rain, while carrying ten textbooks and trying not to cry in front of your clinical instructor. So yes, I’m proud. I should be. This journey stripped me bare, but it also showed me what I’m made of. I’m not just someone who made it through nursing school. I’m someone who did it while being a mom, a wife, and a daughter and still showed up for myself even on the hardest days.

To anyone who’s still in it, cry if you need to. Take the nap. Eat the donut. And please, don’t ever confuse being tired with being weak. You are building something so much bigger than you can see right now.

If you are in nursing school, I would love to help you in any way I can, Dosage Calculations, Mental Health, Pharmacology, MedSurg, Maternal Newborn and Peds and others.

You've got this!

I want to leave you with these beautiful lyrics from Samantha Ebert's song called Flowers.

So I brought it up in a desperate prayer. “Lord, why are you keeping me here?” Then He said to me, "Child, I'm planting seeds. I'm a good God and I have a good plan so trust that I'm holding a watering can, and someday you'll see that flowers grow in the valley.” -Flowers by Samantha Ebert

This is all for you Gwapo and Gabgab